Well folks, I'm writing to you from the other side of change—the side I've been trudging toward for pretty much the entire month of October. It feels fairytale-ish to wake up every morning to a world with enough space for me, an engaging career, and Cam, even though fairytales rarely involve poop diapers and pumps...and I don't mean black leather pumps.
This side of 6 months into motherhood and 2 weeks of full-time childcare under my belt feels nothing like I expected. I thought I would feel like a dead-beat, uninvolved mom being away from Cameron 40 hours each week. I thought the oxytocin high that helps me power through sleep deprivation would vanish into oblivion. Instead I feel more competent at work and at home, and oxytocin is still my best friend.
I learned a lot about change during the past month. I learned that you have to get very specific about what it is you want, and you have to want it bad. Maybe you can't pick up and move across the street from your work like I did, but there are so many options. What about arranging a nanny share at your house so you don't have to make the daycare commute every day? Could you telecommute one or two days per week? Could you cut back your work hours or even take a year or two off? Could you hire a housekeeper once per month or every other week so you can spend your down time bonding with your baby instead of doing housework? Or could you get a used Ergo carrier and go through your weekend routine with your baby on your back?
Being a mom is hard whether you work out of the home or not. Go get what you need, mama.
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